Friday, 25 July 2014

I Am Weird. With Tangents

I came across this event this week. I honestly did not know it existed.

Mr C said I should go. Try get out for the house and meet people.  He thinks I've been hiding away from the world. He is probably not wrong.

Sometimes I think I am coping better than I really am. I was looking for a picture to update my facebook page with, because the one I have is ghastly, and I looked at a few blog entries from my pregnancy. I was already showing symptoms at 23 weeks and noone spotted it. It makes me so angry and upset. I can't even look at those posts without getting a lump in my throat.

I keep telling myself that there is nothing I can do about it now but I still feel the way I feel.

I am very nervous about this Creator Day thing. I can just picture myself cringing in a corner, afraid. I never used to be like this. I was always the brave one, in the thick of it all, introducing myself and putting myself out there. Now, meeting new people gives me heart palpitations.

In my head, I'm already looking for a way out.

Just so you know, every time I start writing in this blog, I have every intention to remain up-beat and cheerful. Really. I do. I just fail.

This isn't getting any better. I am working on the happy thoughts. In the mean time, go home. See you later.
I'll try blog something happy. Did I mention I have an Oak tree in my garden with a pair of scampering squirrels. They were running up and down the tree this morning. I was very cute.

Anyway. Go. Go. I'll see you later.

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